Why women date other marrieds?
Speak about a loaded issue that no one wants to talk about, that’s it. Amusing thing, affairs have been going on since old ages. Affairs can be loaded with troubles, cause misery, and other harms. In addition you have to wrap your brain around all the other issues, there’s that truth and sincerety issue, finances, age difference, spiritual education, shame, and on and on. I expect there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the intention of this article I shall define an affair as a long term, maybe weeks long relationship of a sexual nature between two people of whom one or both are married to other wives/husbands, dating married women.
Why do married people have affairs? There are as many answers as there are seeking extramarital affairs. I am conserned typically though it is just the human state, the need for love, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and cherished. Here are a several reasons I have run across.
Physically we as human beings are all sexual creatures. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasant and exciting, and sex makes us escape the world for a small period of time. This ecstasy exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels high enough. Somebody can switch the craving on and off, some are excellent at controlling it and others are so-so at best. Though we all have it, young and elder, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the exhilaration of the chase. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the love for another human being, for some it is the longing to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the whole romance thing. These wishes and yearnings can be so strong they overcome the taboos culture has erected against extramarital affairs. For lots of people the yearnings will beat their doubts and make them risk the fury of not only their family, but society also. So why, what is the catalyst?
Sex Addicts, probably some of us are. Sex is horribly pleasant, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of biologically obsessed sex addicts and can find away to have an affair and not wound your spouse or anyone else? You will need to reduce the threat you are taking. If you have the attitude that a good affair is one that is beneficial to everyone, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I think this is the major group, colossal really. There are many couples whose marriage is over, except they feel comfortable in the way they live, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your other half but there is no romance. Then there are the children to think about. Your funds are so entwined. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to stay together besides love and sex.
Physical reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical reasons that prevent them completing the sex operation, at least not with their othere half. An affair from time to time solves the problem while keeping the marriage uharmed.
Neglect, sorrowfully this is a regular reason I fear. One or the other, frequently the man is sexually neglecting his woman for a large humber of reasons. As a man I actually am grateful to you guys neglecting your ladies and making them accessible to us men of romance, making them “hot milfs” But I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Then there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not just neglectful, but malevolent.
Something is just misplaced in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Perhaps its romance that is missing, maybe it is a lack of love, maybe compassion is not here, maybe it is the closeness, could be neglect. Could be we have just grown distantly, our general interests diverged. Could be it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my ages, is opposed to of what you want. Could be I just don’t know what I want from the marriage anymore. Maybe, just maybe I miss that feeling that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The ultimate reason people give is, they look for the excitement that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to escape, for economic gain, for revenge and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.